You don't get what you want

I am not starting a list of things I should be getting in my life right now. I have wishes, but life will not always give you what you want.

There are many things in my life that I thought I should be having, but you continually wait for years, and it does not happen. You know what I am talking about, winning the lotto. I am just kidding. Who doesn't want to win a million dollars, at least because I do? We realize that some things are arduous, but others are achievable if we put effort and heart into them.

I started to think before that I should be going to graduate school. It took me years to do it, and when I could do it. I went for it. There was a back story with that. I was ready to do a boob job around that time because I had the money, and I was like, hmm, this was my chance. My wise sister gave me "the look" when we chatted and said, "Go back to school, forget about the boob job."So I went and finished it. I wished to have some surgery done. I did not get it. However, I got something bigger. Finishing grad school opened up a lot of doors for me.

We have all these fake wants. We are always in this rat race. Really, who and what are we chasing? I have been wanting to get a luxury bag but stopped myself because it is not something I am into. Do not get me wrong I still want one. I am a shoe person, and there was a point in time when I got crazy with my purchases. As I got older, I realized that it was an addictive trap. I was happy with the thought and the act of purchasing them. However, it quickly vanishes. This idea of "chasing to be happy" with our purchases is a farce. Materialism is a big fat lie.

Everyone searches for that fancy job with a good paycheque, but we forget our passion. We daydream about our possible partner, but still, we end up with someone not good for us. You want to receive an A in your class and end up with a B. We end up with disappointment, disbelief and possibly betrayal from the universe. Then we get to think about why we are so unlucky. So here lies the question, why do we not get what we want?

There is no definite answer. On the other hand, you may get what you need. We are so inundated by what we see on television and social media. Everyone is aiming to get this and that. Even the things we have right now, they are temporary. Cellphones have become a thing of the past because new models keep coming out every year. Your car will break down. The flower in your hands will wither, etc. I would say to enjoy it while you have it in your life.

This idea of "chasing to be happy" with our purchases is a farce. Materialism is a big fat lie.

Letting go of the expectations. We are wired to have initial thoughts and most of the time; they are positive. To lessen the disappointment, let go of the expectations that things will go smoothly. Embrace the process as it happens. Connect deeply with those teaching moments that you encounter along the way. Remember that through connectedness we grow. We become happier person. It is more freeing and less burdensome.

As for the boob job, I am still thinking about it. Will I get them, I do not think so. Maybe it is time to solidify my Ph.D. plan. Shift those thoughts, feed your soul and discover true freedom.